My favorite Snickers® commercial is when a group of friends are in a car, and Aretha Franklin is in the backseat asking to turn the a/c up. When a friend in the front asks her “ you can’t feel that?” she knocks him upside his head, and asks him the same in return. A man sitting beside her hands her a Snickers®  bar and says something to the tune of, “Eat this. You turn into a Diva when you’re hungry.” And the voiceover tagline is “You’re not you when you’re hungry.”™ And boy, did I catch a Word in that. 

When Elijah was fresh off a huge miracle (causing it to stop raining and then restart after 3 years, and calling down fire to destroy the false prophets after embarrassing their attempts to validate their “god”) he got depressed. 1 Kings 18. Now, for context, a crazy, evil queen, unafraid to catch a body, was after him.1 Kings 21. He thought he was alone, that she’d already killed all the prophets of the Most High in Israel, and that alone made his knees buckle. This man, who eventually would be carried off to Heaven in a chariot of Fire, who would later strengthen Yeshua Himself before His crucifixion- had a moment where life got to him. 1 Kings 19. And I can relate. Big time. 

Let me be transparent for a moment: my health has gotten to the place where my team of doctors (IYKYK) have said it’s time to pull out the “big guns.” I have been faced with my mortality before, but something in this recent bout of illness has been different. I’ve never been more afraid, discouraged, anxious, or depressed. Like Elijah on the run, I have been asking God if I will survive this onslaught, and slowly but surely losing the strength to fight to keep on. Don’t worry, neither Elijah and I stay there. See, even though in that moment, both him and I were in places where we were exhausted, afraid, and doubtful that God’s plan included our lives to be spared - God did not hold that against either of us. God sent Elijah an angel to feed him. No- like food. Not spiritual food. Just some fresh-baked bread and some water. And then told him to sleep. And rinse, and repeat.

Let me pause for a second. Like Elijah, myself, and the Snickers® commercial- we are not our (best) selves when we are hungry. And that hunger can look like many things. Starved for love and affection. Starved for attention. Starved for touch. Starved for connection. Starved for food. Starved for hydration. Starved for Spiritual nourishment. Whatever it is- we are not ourselves when we are in this condition. And we tend to do some extreme things when we find ourselves in that position.

Elijah ran away. Like “ran and hid in the wilderness” ran away. And then asked God to kill him. 1 Kings 19:3 - 9. I chose to withdraw into solitude, and pulled away from people who love me, God included. In a starved Samaria, people cooked and ate feces, killed their children and ate them, and did all sorts of terrible things to try and cure that starvation.  2 Kings 6:24-33. Maybe you find yourself having done things you consider drastically different from how you’d normally behave. Maybe your starvation from affection makes you cling to people who don’t truly have your best interests at heart. Maybe you found yourself sleeping with someone just to feel something, anything to break the numbness you’ve felt. Maybe you moved to a different location. Or changed jobs. Maybe you lied, stole, cheated. Maybe you did something you think is completely out of character for you, out of composure for you, out of calling for you. I’m here to tell you that you are not you, at least your best you, when you’re hungry.

So let me tell you what can feed you, and keep you full enough to last until you get the full measure of what you need. I won’t mince words here. It’s Yeshua, as you probably already guessed. But it’s not just as simple as “say a quick prayer and be good.” Because when you get into this phase of hunger, baby let me tell you it takes a lot to get out. Twice did that angel wake him up and make him eat, hydrate, and then sleep. Once wasn’t enough. He needed to eat, drink, and sleep. And that food held him up as he traveled again to a mountain cave on Sinai, where he had a meeting with God. 

One thing I love about my God is that God don’t ever miss. God knew that Elijah didn’t need that sermon, confrontation, or even a church service. He needed to eat, drink some water, and sleep. So God ministered to Elijah’s physical needs, so that He/They could address his spiritual inner conflict. 1 Kings 19:5-9. And God did the same for me. Fresh out the hospital, detoxing from a ton of meds, I was terrified, convinced I would not be long for this world. And you know what? I still might not be- but what has changed is that My God visited me and encouraged me in the middle of my fear, anxiety and distrust in Him and His plan for me- just to remind me how loved and seen I was- and to tell me that His perfect plan never fails. For me to be actively running from His presence, He took time to meet me when I finally stopped running. And reminded me not only of Who He Is, but who I am in Him.

 And when I tell you, though my situation is the EXACT same, I’m not the same. My mindset is not the same. My fear is gone. His Perfect Love sent it packing. He came to feed me in moments of my deepest hunger. He filled me with the Water of Life (John 4:14; Jer. 2:13 ; Jer. 17:13; John 7:38; Luke 6:21). And He let me rest in His perfect peace Isai. 26:3. Like with Elijah’s case, the situation didn’t change, but the stakes did. You move different when you’re reminded that not only do you own the cheat codes- but the game has already been won for you. So some of you may be neck deep in that hunger for whatever it is: love, success, peace, food- but remember- there is more in store for you. Your hunger will be filled, your thirst quenched, and you will find rest. Someone is waiting, just for you to ask, to give it to you. 

Though your situation might not change- your perspective will. And that is worth so much more than I can put into words. You might not always win your battles (but that war is won!). You might still have the drama. Might need to suffer some consequences. Might go through some fires, mountains, storms- but it’s different when you eat from the Bread of Life John 6:35. You get to experience fulfillment that doesn’t make sense (“peace that passes understanding” for you traditional folks). Phil. 4:7. And that is a gamechanger in surviving this world. 

Elijah didn’t know how his story would end, and frankly, neither do I. God can choose to take me in a day, week, month, or year. Or maybe I’ll be here till I’m 100. But, regardless of what happens to me, I know I’m rooted in the One who loves me so, so much. The One who keeps me safe, sane, and secure. I could end up in a chariot of fire. Or I could end up in a grave. Either way, God is in control, so blessed be MY Lord, who keeps me. 

So, go on get that Heavenly Snickers® bar, baby. You’re not your (best) self when you’re hungry.